Keeping it Dark

Big/Little Reveal

Maddy's Bid Day

“We have to keep the fam dark,” these words were spoken by none other than Girard — soon to be my

g-big. Running home to Alpha Xi, I knew it was where I belonged, having committed to the sorority

through a suicide bid. Sorority people understand the gravity of a suicide bid, and others simply know the

risk of not being placed in a sorority at all. The connections I had already made with the AXID girls were

undeniable.

On bid day, I sprinted straight to Polina; she and I had become very close during recruitment.

So I already knew I wanted her to be my big. Taking loads of pictures — as one does on bid day —
Girard mentioned to my ginger friend that they liked her, however, they had to keep the farm dark, as she
looked at Polina and me taking pictures. Keeping the fam dark refers to dark brunette hair color, as Polina,
Girad and I all shared. Unknowingly at the time, I became more and more nervous as the big little reveal
was nearing. I knew I wanted her to be my big, but how could I be certain she wanted me? That question
rattled in my mind for days as the anticipation of the reveal lingered. Then the happy yet potentially
dreadful day of reveal came. I was dressed in angel wings and a halo, thank goodness. Some people

were dressed up as fish and other miscellaneous creatures, so I was very grateful. They began calling us

in small groups to be revealed, and of course, I was in the last group. Walking inside there was a curtain

that was mildly seen through. Through the curtain, I could see Polina's silhouette. When the curtain

dropped I was so thankful. 

Since reveal Polina and I have become best friends, we do most things together. So when I became a
sophomore I knew my family's one rule, keep it dark. 

So I did just that. All my friends and I were stalking everyone who we thought might go through
recruitment. And a glimmering light shined down and there lay Maddy Todorovich's Instagram profile.
Isabella, now president of Alpha Xi, told me her mom was an AXID alumnus here at Ohio Northern —
perfect! From that point, I reached out to her on Instagram like a 14-year-old boy begging for her

attention. We met up at Starbucks soon after and had really good conversations. Then recruitment hit,

good golly it's stressful. Your mouth is drier than a dessert, greasy unwashed hair, a full face of makeup

and enough self-tanner to mimic an orange, but at the end of it all, I knew I wanted Maddy as my little.

If she went to Alpha Xi after seeing me in that state, I’m certain nothing would deter her. I applied to be

a big and started hanging out with her more on the regular. But, she didn't know for certain if I was her

big, sounds like a familiar situation, right? I tried to keep it as ambiguous as possible, but I did not do a

very good job. I’ll give myself a B+ for effort. I dropped the ball when reveal day came around. We were

set up outside for the reveal and I was supposed to bring my speaker to play music. As I lugged my

speaker through the front door all of our new members were sitting in plain sight. UGH. Running back

into the house, like a dog with its tail between its legs, I knew she saw me and what I was wearing. Which

was the same outfit she was — SURPRISE OFFICIALLY RUINED. I still think about that, and now I

laugh because it probably relieved her, but spoiled the surprise. 

Big whoopty-do to no one's surprise, the curtain fell and we hugged each other as confetti cannons

went off that Polina and Girard were holding — it's a family tradition. And from this moment on Maddy

and I have grown extremely close. In fact, at formals, we received the best new big/little duo superlative

— duh. Needless to say, I love my family and we're all best friends. I wouldn't have it any other way.

So, quoting Girard as my last remarks, keep it dark Maddy, keep it dark.